The first time back in Court

Well, the first shot has been fired, so to speak. Mark and I went to Court this morning and faced Simon and his solicitor. We had to wait ages. I fairly quickly found my fear was giving way to boredom. Have you noticed how difficult it is to be scared and bored at the same time? Trust me, it is. I finally realized I recognised one of those waiting with us. It was Ron, erstwhile Vicar of Simon’s last Parish. He looked bored as well – and uncomfortable. I found it vaguely amusing that Simon needed his companionship – again. Ron tagged along at the last Court hearing in Eastbourne too. Poor Ron. If he only knew the contempt Simon has always felt for him. He doesn’t, of course. So he sifted through the old magazines in the waiting room and then fell asleep. At least he didn’t snore! Finally we were called. I saw the Judge raise a slight eyebrow when Simon gave as his reason for denying me all contact the fact that Mark had lost his temper with Flavia on one occasion. Simon’s solicitor (not Roger The Shark) gave their reasons as to why the case needs to be moved to Eastbourne. The Judge kindly pointed out that the argument regarding expense would be equally valid for Mark and myself if the case were moved to Eastbourne. i have to admit to feeling hopeful at that. The solicitor also stated that there was no basis for Mark being part of the application since he has no parental responsibility. Well, stop using him as an excuse for being difficult and spiteful then! Obviously we didn’t have a solicitor. Can’t afford one. I tried speaking on our behalf, countering a timeline the solicitor gave the Judge which included the fact that I had agreed to every other weekend with Flavia. The Judge didn’t look terribly impressed with Simon’s argument regarding Flavia being ‘condemned to a state education' if I moved her with me to Surrey. However, the end result was that the case is being moved to Eastbourne. That’s a 30 minute journey for Simon and a 3-4 hour one for us. If the next hearing is at 10.00 in Eastbourne it means we have to leave the house at 6.15. Six fifteen! My stamina needs to improve, that’s for certain. The Judge was not impressed by Simon’s claim that, because Mark had shouted at her that once, he did not feel he should make her come to our house. Instead he said we should have contact and, if we couldn’t come to an agreement, he would make an Order. Simon argued it, claiming I had never tried to have contact with her (liar, liar pants on fire – as a certain person would say). Out of the Court Simon’s solicitor was running around, back and fore. I suggested meeting in Guildford – Mark is, obviously, to be nowhere around. Too violent, vicious and scary. Looking in the mirror again? Simon refused, suggesting Eastbourne. What? He expects me to travel 7 hours for a three-hour meeting? Yes, she’s my daughter but I don’t need to go south for all that time, especially when one considers he lives 25 miles to the north of Eastbourne!! He then suggested we alternate. Two Saturdays we meet in Guildford (40 minutes travelling for me, 60 for him) and two Saturdays we meet in Uckfield (5 minutes for him, 3 hours for me). No. If he wants me to travel all the way to Uckfield then he comes closer to me. So, we agreed two times in Uckfield, two times in Woking. Uckfield is going to be fun for me, anyway. A forty-minute wait before they turn up and a forty minute wait after they leave. I will be frozen. Trust me on this one. Moreover, there’s nothing to DO in Uckfield. Check out the few shops and spend some time in the Tesco café I suspect. However, I half expect to find Flavia will be too traumatized to make the meeting anyway. Amazingly. I’m feeling rather low. I miss her, I’m worrying about what it will be like to see her again after all the claims Simon has made regarding not wanting to see me or speak to me. I’m worrying about the money regarding journeying to Eastbourne and the need for a solicitor. We need one. Desperately. Even Mark says Roger will eat us alive without one. Yet how do we pay? All the websites say one should hire a solicitor immediately. How without money? And even if we had the cash, how do we find one that won’t roll over and beg when Roger sends his first salvo? That requires interviews and we are too far away. Arghhhh. I have Parent’s Consultation this evening (four interviews…there are advantages to teaching a subject no parent cares about) and then my worst day tomorrow, including the Class from Hell. And Mark has been very naughty (again) and not won the lottery. I don’t know. Can’t trust anyone. Social Services still haven't been in touch. Two 'phone calls and one email later. There's power in that there collar. Note to the gullible. Miracles DON'T happen and the good will not inherit the earth. They will just be booted around until they give in. Just thought I'd share that with you.